Friday, March 19, 2010

About Last Night....

My husband is not fun when drinking. A beer buzz isn’t bad but if he hits the rum there will be an ass raping of illogical proportions. He becomes shitty an intolerable and the night ends with me sleeping as far over on my side of the bed as I can get without falling off. He’s a great guy and doesn’t drink often but when he does, holy shiznit.

Last nigh was a rum night. He had to meet clients for drinks in order to avoid a meal with them. No big deal, I didn’t even flinch when he told me. He arrived home early with a buzz but still in good spirits. Then he hit our bottle of Courvoissier. I should have gone to bed but I am obviously a slow learner. With each drink communication got cloudier and arguments ensued. As we bickered over stupid things like a meeting he had earlier with his ex-mother in law and one of his morally bankrupt clients he had this look on his face like I had just shit in his morning bowl of Quaker Oates. He proceeded to comment on how I have no idea what it’s like in the world because my biggest problem is that my 2 year old wakes up at 545 some mornings. Lest we forget that up until 3 years ago I worked at many jobs and received a Bachelor’s degree in Elementary Ed going on to teach the youth. Of course, this set me off so pretty much anything he said from that point on was going to offend. We don’t scream and yell, it’s strictly arguments and dirty looks. I often stay up to make sure he doesn’t go for a drive or try to ride his motorcycle in his inebriated state. These are stupid decisions he’s made while under the influence in the past and though I’m angry at him I do not wish physical harm or a night in the tank on him. The arguing was interrupted by my dad returning home from work at which point I went up to bed only to be joined 5 minutes later by drunkey. He climbed into bed and made frequent attempts at touching and holding me which after his earlier comments was not an option. I finally told him in no uncertain terms that he was to leave me the hell alone until morning which upset him. He slept on the chaisse lounge in our room. This arrangement was fine with me as I had dreams of leaving him. That’s another crazy thing, on drunken nights I have bad dreams about him and wake up still angry. He wakes up guilty and forgetful. I envy him. He doesn’t have the slide show of crappy events from the night before running through his head.

This has only happened sporadically over the 4 years we’ve been together and I always forget within a few days. The thing that sucks is we get along great. He’s my best friend. Nights like last night are the only crack in the marriage though they are often worked out the next day.

The biggest buzz kill for him is his job. He is VP of a contracting company and has many stressful days. If he’s in a bad mood prior to drinking that will be magnified after a few. Weekends are his optimum drinking time but since he’s a social drinker and mainly drinks during client meetings on weekdays he misses his good buzz window. He hates this situation just as much as I do and has made it a policy not to drink but a meetings will come up and he’ll uncounciously have a little too much landing us back in the manure.

Last night too shall pass but it sucked. Maybe next time I see the warning signs I’ll just save us both the hassle and knock him out with a blunt object. Not hard enough to seriously injure him, more of a love tap to send him off to sleepy land and allow me the peace I so deserve.

*****Thank you for reading all of this but before you comment please save the preaching for someone else. I am not abused in any way and my husband does not drink often enough to be an alcoholic. I appreciate anyone’s concern but I am fine and this post is just an explanation of my thoughts. I don’t need to be saved or hear suggestions as to how to get help. Entertainment value only people.

Does your husband/wife have some quirk or issue you live with under protest? Do you ever have nights like mine which aren’t paramount but are annoying none the less?


Lluvia said...

My husband doesn't do that, but my mother did. She wasn't a very nice person when she drank. She too, did socially, only at parties or get togethers. She was mean and always yelled when drunk.

I was afraid of her at times. No, she didn't abuse us or anything, but yeah, I completely understand what you go through.

It was just one of those sucky days.

Sabreena said...

Yeah, he sucks at times. The next morning he actually decided it just isn't worth the trouble. He doesn't like waking up not knowing what happened and me being mad at him. He's kind of like a monkey, smart but a slow learner at times.

Anonymous said...

No preaching here, I actually admire the way you handle that situation. Good for you! Also since it's only a rare occasion, Bravo for you not making that big a deal out of it! Also BRAVO to be so nonchalant about the whole thing. I like your blog, and I stole your button. I am now following you and if you have a follow by email I am gonna do that too so I don't miss anything!!

Sabreena said...

Thanks elliej! I do think of myself as quite the awsome chick when it comes to these evenings. Plus, my husband is so good after one of these "happenings" that it's hard to stay mad. I appreaciate your comment.

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