WTF Have I Been Doing...

This was a draft I started sometime after April of 2011. Though it is no longer relevant to me and the last 4 years of my life I think it is relevant overall. Since I am trying to ease back into being creative I thought I would use the post below as my Christmas past to ease me into my Christmas present....

Maybe you're wondering where I went. Maybe you could care less and have just stopped visiting. Maybe you dropped out of my followers list. Whatever YOU have been doing I have been busy and was just plain blogged out. After my last post I started to feel like I was wasting time and really saying nothing of interest, so I stopped. I didn't announce the stop as I didn't feel there was anyone to announce it to. I felt it presumptuous to think there was someone out there worried about why I had stopped writing here. Today I remembered that the person I was writing for to begin with was me  and I was missing me and wondering where I had gone.

For the first few months I was busy with family and just had nothing to write about but, as of March I became a working woman again (sort of). My husband started his own business. He finally left the confines of his boss's narrow and ignorant vision to begin his own construction firm. Since then I have been running his office through our home as well as doing the stay at home mom gig. Now, my responsibilities aren't bad and come mostly after the boys go to bed but, just having responsibilities outside of my boys again has been exhilarating. I feel like I am contributing again and I am reminded that the cobwebs were just temporary and my skills are still sharp and not just memories.

My husband, in trying to pay me a compliment, explained that my skills have exceeded his expectations of what I could do. Though he meant it as a boost the comment made me a little sad and nervous. After 4 years out of the work force was this what I would face in the real world? Since Dave is my husband landing this job was a given, but had I had to interview would I have even been able to get my foot in the door or would the assumption that my brain had purged all useful information kept me from any type of career? I had many jobs prior to my husband and children including McDonalds, logistics, customer service, telemarketing, waitressing, teaching, and many more. Having knowledge of my expansive job past AND living with me Dave still wondered what I could handle so what the hell would a complete stranger think of my mommy time out's affect on my abilities to do anything except wipe noses and scrub toilets? I enjoy working again but now fear what will happen when I do decide to re-enter the work force.

How do you prove to someone that you're still relevant and useful after not working for 5 years? I could go back to school and get my Master's but that is an expensive training program which still doesn't ensure someone will hire me. I never really thought about this portion of the stay at home job. Working for Dave will definitely help thank gosh but what about all of the women who don't have a husband to work for as a means of building some current work experience prior to their children's elementary school induced exodus which leaves them with the question of "What now?". There should be a network of some kind for moms like me where they can get help or references to smooth their transition back into the work force (maybe there is, I haven't been researching). I have kept some  my connections within the school district here as best I could just in case. I guess that is a good piece of advice, when you leave keep in touch.

Right now, I am enjoying helping my husband become a success as he deserves. He spent many years building his reputation and has a real shot at being successful in an industry which is suffering greatly right now. In helping him I am gaining my professional equilibrium as well. Soon he will have an office with a hired office person whom I will hand over the reigns to but, for now, it's all me and I am enjoying it. As for what will happen later, I guess I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. Maybe I'll just become a kept woman and spend my time volunteering, prettying up my husband's arm, and telling the nanny how to raise my boys. Who knows what the future holds. I would have never thought life would be what it is now and won't even try to guess where it will be next week.

I hope you enjoyed this post even if it was from a while back. I will try to follow up soon with a "WTF Have I Been Doing" sequel to catch up on the time between writing this and now. It may take a few chapters as a lot has happened but now that I have time again I will try to document the stretch. I hope those still reading are well and anyone new returns. Talk soon!