Friday, November 20, 2009

Moms Gone Bitch!!!!!!

You know who you are. You were cool before kids but now, not so much. I don’t know what it is about having kids that causes some moms to go bitch. You know those women, walking around with that look on their face like they just caught the scent of shit and it’s smeared all over you and your kids. Giving unsolicited advice in a manner that makes you want to bitch slap them and run away quickly. I myself have developed certain quirks I never had before such as stress induced episodes of intolerance toward my family and laziness that is beyond embarrassing. I noticed this bitchy gene when my first son was born and I joined an advice community called Babycenter. It is supposed to be a place to gain advice and feel connected to others going through the crazy shit all mothers go through. Through this website I noticed that some women use it as a platform for their never ending judgmental “I’m and expert at mothering” attitudes. I quickly realized this attitude isn’t reserved for the website. It has infiltrated playgroups, birthday parties, schools, and anywhere else we hens tend to gather and cackle. The last time I was judged so harshly or so often was in high school. That was a cakewalk compared to what we go through as mothers because of each other. I have avoided playgroups outside my small circle of friends for this reason. At least with my friends I can say “Hey you’re being kind of a bitch right now so could you please back the fuck up” and I won’t be evicted from the group. My kids are actually pretty well behaved but when we’re out or with some people the only things I notice is what I think other moms will pick up on like my son taking any toy he sees in another toddlers hands or how I yell after the 5th time telling one of my kids to stop touching stuff at the store. If you happen to be there during one of my "episodes" don’t give me those condescending or disgusted looks because you know your perfect ass and your little asshole offspring are guilty of those behaviors sometimes. You’re just better at not doing it publicly. Instead, smile at me with that look of “been there sister” like some of the nicer species of mom do. It’s great that you’ve mastered a skill for which there is no training camp or book but could you please kick that knowledge down to the rest of us in a manner that is a little less, well, bitchy?


Brakes and Gas said...

I so know what you mean about the judgey moms. Call me naive but this demographic took me by surprise when the Weez was born and I was going bonkers looking for adult conversation. I developed a richter scale for compatible mom friends; If they had wine with me during play-dates then they were cool. If they didn't then we obviously did not have another!

Mrsblogalot said...

LOL! Amen sister!

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