I waste a lot of time wondering how I waste so much time and why I feel so overwhelmed. It’s not like my duties as housewife change every two days, but I still couldn't’t figure out why nothing was getting done. Then, I figured it out. I feel overwhelmed which leads to me doing nothing at all because I am the queen of avoidance. Though my job activities are fairly simple they become overwhelming because they never feel done. When I taught I had the ability to feel accomplishment and that I had COMPLETED a task. I could measure this through my students’ grades after a lesson or through finishing a section of a textbook successfully. No matter what I do around this damn house nothing ever feels done. I can (and on occasion do) spend a whole day cleaning and scrubbing and washing only to have my husband and kids screw it up within the first hour of being home. My boys (who lets face it don’t know better yet) get more food on the table during one meal than in their little stomachs, my husband will ash/shave (without rinsing) in the sink I just cleaned, or my dad will make his morning toast without cleaning up the subsequent crumbs. So, after busting my ass I have to go back and clean the same thing within hours of its first scrubbing which I refuse to do because I am not the Merry fucking Maids and housework bores me to the point of tears. It took me so long to figure this out but this is why nothing gets done, because if I can’t feel that sense of accomplishment at least once or twice a week for more than 2 hours I will avoid doing the task. I understand that we live here and that shit happens (both in and out of my children’s diapers) so all I’m asking is that the other adults that live here pick up after themselves the first day or two after they notice I have cleaned. I chose to be a housewife and take care of my family which I don’t mind on a reasonable basis but that does not mean I am an indentured servant or Bill Murray in “Groundhog Day”. I do not wish to clean the sink or toilet twice a day. I prefer to do it like 2 times a week (that may be lazy but that’s the way I roll). Now instead of wasting time wondering how I waste time I am free to waste my time plotting a scheme to extract some assistance from the other residents of my house (bigs and littles).
Hmmmm, looks like I’ll be waking up in Punxsutawney again tomorrow.
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